Sunday, February 6, 2011
We started a 5 week series at church based on the popular book, "The Five Love Languages". I posted about this book two years ago, and Daddy and I took the test, and we both scored the same top two languages. Daddy and I both value Quality Time and Acts of Service. Both of these expressions of love require mental output, a heart knowledge of your loved one, and effort. We both appreciate the qualities involved in the effectiveness of these two by-products of love.
Today, the focus was on the language of "Words of Affirmation". Daddy did a great job speaking about how Jesus was the best example for this model, as He always encouraged and affirmed his followers and children. I really saw the quality of this particular love language last night as I was interacting with you, Kenters.
Kent, you just sat through Parker's basketball game that morning, and soccer game that afternoon. You are around Parker when he is praised by us and others for his athletic accomplishments. I am very careful that you receive praise for what you do and try to do. You love to do art, so currently I have 4 of your art projects on our fridge, so "everyone in the whole wide world can see them!"
I was asking you about the approaching t-ball season this spring. You are hesitant because it took you 4 games to actually stay on the soccer field for the entire game. I think those same fears about t-ball loom at your surface. When I inquired about you playing t-ball for the first time, and soccer for the second time, your eyes grew big with fear and concern.
"You are so fast Kent! You are one of the fastest guys on the field. And your kicks! They are so powerful. It's probably because you are so strong. And you always try so hard to do your best!" I went on and on praising you.
With each compliment and affirming word, your smile widened and your shoulders pushed farther back. With your chest puffed out, you began running around the house showing off all of your soccer and t-ball "skills".
You began to believe the words I was telling you. Your thoughts about yourself were being formed based upon what I was saying to you. You began to be convinced that you were great at these sports. You were convinced that you possessed the ability to succeed at these activities. Your confidence was boosted as a direct result of my affirming words.
Like Proverbs 19 says, words truly hold the power of life and death. I saw the importance of speaking affirmatively towards you. I saw the necessity of encouraging your weakness, and speaking positively about your ability to try your hardest at whatever task is before you.
The Lord really instructed my heart last night, and gave me the insight to be very conscious about the words that I speak to both of you. My words of affirmation can shape your view of yourself, the world, and of God Himself.