Monday, September 14, 2009

Faith. It's a difficult concept for me, and I am not proud to admit that. I have faith enough to believe that God spoke this world into existence. I have faith that Jesus paid the price for my transgressions, and that my sins have been forgiven. I have faith that Jesus can heal the sick, satisfy my soul's deepest longings, and give me peace beyond my understanding. I have faith that Jesus is real, I have faith that He is alive, and I have faith that He is coming again.

I however lack faith when it comes to trusting Jesus with the everyday details of my life. I lack faith when it comes to trusting Jesus with my future, and with trusting that His plans for my life are good. How can I believe that Jesus raises the dead, but that managing my life is too difficult for Him? Why do I lack faith in His design and in His plan. Why do I lack faith in God's purpose for me?

It almost seems humorous to me. I have faith in God to keep the planets in motion, but I doubt His ability to direct my path.

This is my life verse that I would like to share with you. It helps me to keep things in perspective, and it helps me to be reminded of God's sovereign rule over the world and His specific plan for me.

"For He has assigned my portion and cup, and has made my lot secure."

God, the one who does miracles on a daily basis, has an explicit purpose for me. It is distinct. It is intentional. And it is accurate. He has assigned me a present and a future, and no circumstance that I find myself in takes Him by surprise. He has made my lot in life safe, fixed, and secure.

If faith is believing without seeing, then I need to trust Him even when I can't see past the bend in the road. But here's the thing. I HAVE seen. I've seen that He is good. I've seen how He loves me. I've seen how He provides for me. I have seen, and yet still I have trouble believing that He can govern and guide my life.

Faith is being sure of what we hope for. I am hoping to be found faithFUL in my quest for a faith.

1 comment:

Mike Stenglein said...

you are not alone. I struggle with control daily. No matter how many times I pray and give things over to God so that He can direct me...I still find myself wrestling with God. As Jacob found out..He is just a tad stronger. To relate, our current Ypastor John (no PErik by any stretch :-) ) told a story of when he wrestled with his call to ministry. He had to make a choice between two occupations and was staring at the ceiling fan..He said "God, if you want me to do Choice 1, make the fan move." He waited for 3 hours and no movement. "God, if you want me to do choice 2 then make the fan move!" Again, a coule of hours go by. No dice. So he decides to get up and go about his day..About two hours later the A/C kicks on and as a result it moves the fan blades. He looked up and hollered out to God "BUT Which one?!?!?"

I guess my point is that looking back at my life I can see so many times when I raced for control and lost and gave up control and then tried to force my own path...
It took some pretty great friends out your way that finally helped me to loosen my grip on my life. His hand is much bigger.
Anyways, Thanks and I hope the rambling helped!